Pagkatapos ng Panaginip

Pagkatapos ng Panaginip

Sabay ng pagsilip ng liwanag,
Habang ang umaga’y nababasag.
Naglalakad sa bagong araw,
Ngunit ganoon pa din ang galaw.
Ang pintig ng oras ay lumilipas,
Sapagkat ang mundo’y yun ang bigkas.
Ang bilis ng mga kulay,
Sana’y meron namang buhay.
Nakatunganga sa malayo,
Hawak hawak ang nakatagong anyo.
Pagkatapos ng panaginip,
Ang bagong umaga’y sumisilip.

mga litrato.

ilan sa mga litratong aking nakuha mula nakaraang taon.


ruined night.

rest in red surface little green.

green plants can be seen at night.

let me make light.

water is prettier when not moving.

dark is coming my dear.

sweet is.

keep still.

forgiveness.

life is long, fix it.

innocent looking.

Bagong Mundo (part 1)

Being inside the seminary for four years is not that easy.

Yes, I really enjoyed the time I spent inside the seminary, the makukulit classmates, the priest formators, sports time, the countdown of days before going home, the morning and evening prayers, the daily masses, the visiting Sundays, the delicious foods inside the seminary refectory (care of kuya Arthur) and more of privileges. But there is one thing that we were deprived of… our socialization with the different people outside the seminary, this is my big problem.

I will study at a university in Manila, I lack socialization skills. I don’t know much how I will socialize with my classmates, schoolmates. It’s a very different world outside. For four years I used to see same faces and places, but outside I will see different faces every now and then.

I am giving myself one year to adjust myself to this new world, a different environment.

to be continued...

para sa mga walang kapangyarihan

Lahat naman siguro tayo nagiisip na mga kaweirduhan at kabaliwan sa buhay. Naiisip na nating magbalik sa nakaraan upang mabago ang mga nakaligtaang gawin. Humiling na sana pwde pang magtagal ng tulog sa kama. Umasang umulan ng malakas para makansela ang mga pasok.

Masarap magimagine ng mga bagay na nating kayang gawin. Ang lumipad sa kalawakan at makipag usap sa mga ibon o di naman kaya ay para tipid sa pamasahe. Ngunit kung eto naman ang paguuusapan ay pinakamainam na magteleport na lamang. “Sana ako nalang si Superman para may xray vision,” ung ganung mga pagiisip baga.

Ikaw? Ano kaya ang gustong gusto mong iimagine na pwdeng mangyari sa tunay na buhay? Lumipad? Lumiiit? Maging inbisibol? Tumalino? o magpakamatay kaya?

Congratulations, Goodbye

I wrote a song for our band. The song is about the ending of our seminary life in Our Lady of Guadalupe Minor Seminary. The time was so fast and at last we came to the time of saying goodbyes and see you sometime.

Verse 1:
We walked together in the revolving sun
I held your hands as I sway around
Time catches up and we can’t run
End will start new and we can’t hide
Yesterday is in our hearts
I hope this will not end
As I go, let memories fill our tears

Pre Chorus:
Four years lasted so fast
So we sing this for last

Chorus:
This is our last hymn
And we can’t forget each other
This is our last hymn
And we have to face this together
This is our last hymn
And we have to sing this, we have to sing this
This is our last hymn…

Verse 2:
This last music, for another end
The light of the start stopped
I tell you forever is near
Will face this without fear.


I remembered our Student Council President when I was on my 2nd year in the seminary. He told us: “Ang apat na taon, sobrang bilis lang niyan, paggising mo kinabukasan aalis ka na dito (seminary) at graduate ka na.” I kept this on my mind and tried to know if it is a reality. After four years, indeed it was a damn reality. I was not able to realize how time can be so fast, and it can’t wait.

I woke up one day and I have to leave the home where I stayed for four years.

I thank OLGMS for making me a better person. I don’t know what will happen to me if I studied outside the seminary. I have my own biases about studying outside; I know I have the advantage on spiritual aspect. I became closer to Him and known Him well than before. I was able to find my real self. Thanks a lot.



I am now an OLGMS alumnus. My name now is Lorenzo G. Tacadao not Seminarian Lorenzo G. Tacadao anymore. I left the seminary with much joy in my heart.

all my academic things were all boxed up

packing up my beddings

my empty cabinet

who knows?

i am. then who knows?

i just lost my girlfriend, i lost my most precious possession of all, my sony cybershot 4.1 mp digicam. last 3 weeks ago my camera was gone from our office in the seminary (the newsletter and year book office), i usually leave it there because its our office then out of the moon someone took my camera, i almost hated every people in the world. but if it is gone then gone. and i have a new camera this time it is olympus 5.1 mp. then what i have is what i have.

then who knows?

last friday (march 17) our class (seniors) had thesis defense. i was really afraid not to defend my thesis very well. but after the defense our principal announced the nominees for the best thesis then out of the stars he announced my name. who knows? yesterday (march 18) noon, my classmate called me that i am the best thesis awardee. who knows? i really did not expect any award or certificate on my graduation day, but i think my mom has to come up to stage on my graduation day.

i am.

i lost. i did not find.

who knows?

only God.


ps:
this summer vacation i will have a photo exhibit

bahagi lamang tayo ng ating pagkatao

Halos dalawang buwan na ang nakalipas, eto ako uli…

Madilim ang kwarto. Ang daming pumapasok na kung anu ano sa utak nating mga mahihinang tao. Mga kathang isip na binubulag tayo sa katotoohanan. Hindi natin alam kung totoo o gawa gawa lng ng ating mga malilikot na imahinasyon. Bakit nga ba ang tao takot sa mga bagay na hindi pa nangyayari at nasisindak sa mga pwedeng mangyari? Malamang natural na lang sa ating mga nilalang na maging “paranoid” sa mga bagay bagay na hindi pa nangyayari at hindi pa nakikita. Mahirap matulog kapag sobrang daming iniisip na nagdudulot sa atin ng sindak at pagkatakot. Sino may kung bukas ay makita na lang natin ang ating sariling katawan na nakahiga ng mahimbing sa kama at tayo ay malayang nakakalipad sa kamalayan ng buhay. Malay natin diba? Sino may alam? Kung pwede nga lang daw itigil ang oras at maglakbay sa iba’t ibang panahon, sana nga, pero hindi maari, kailangan nating sumabay sa katotoohanan ng buhay, kailangan nating umangkas sa pag-ikot ng mundo. Ang hirap umalis sa posibilidad na tayo ay tao lamang, wala tayong magagawa.